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WORLDLY NEWS NOW TIMELINE
2006 - 9999 AD
WISE MAN MISSING !
April 1, 2006 AD - A wise man
has been reported missing today. Details of his identity
and whereabouts are unknown. Authorities would say only
that a wise man has been lost.
CONFLICT LINKED TO WISE ABSENCE
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January 19, 2081 AD - The current absence of a wise man has been linked to conflict throughout the world, according to a recent study.
The struggle between the opposing sides of an issue has long been
known to stimulate well being in the presence of a wise man,
states the report. However, in the presence of no wise man,
blind destruction is likely.
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WISEMAN REMAINS UNFOUND
October 3, 3109 AD -
Little hope remains of finding a wise man today.
Authorities are beginning to discuss alternative ways of adding
wisdom to the present.
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SCIENTIST SUGGESTS NEW WISDOM SOURCE
May 3, 4625 AD - The
potential to extract wisdom from ordinary reality has long been
theorized, but few have ever succeeded in actually harnessing
the wisdom of the present. Now scientists are working hard
to understand the structure and behavior of wisdom in the effort
to use it to restore normal wisdom levels in humanity. "We have isolated what we believe to be a wise presence in
the environment," said one researcher, "but so far the
human body's normal immune system rejects it." |
WISDOM UNPROPHETABLE
July 2, 5571 AD - There would be plenty of wisdom available were it not for the
economic necessity of exorbitant profits, lavish lifestyles, and
illusions of grandeur and power, said one "out of work"
prophet. Nobody can afford to entertain wisdom
anymore, it just costs too much. |
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EGO-FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENT BLAMED FOR
WISE
ABSENCE
February 27, 6008
AD - The disappearance of a wise man in the
early 2000's was probably caused by the toxic egotistical
environment which flourished at that time. |
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PRESIDENT CALLS FOR
RESPONSE!
March 32, 7948 AD - In
a speech today, the President called for a response to
the absence of a wise presence. |
CONGRESS PASSES TIME
August 8, 8848 AD - In
a bold attempt to stimulate dangerously low human wisdom levels,
Congress today passed a massive funding bill for the purchase of time in which
to contemplate this issue. |
DAILY UNIVERSITY ENDOWED
April 1, 9999 AD - The
effort to replenish the wisdom of the present and to balance
internal conflict is the goal of study at Daily University,
which now boasts over 999 trillion students! Due to the
size and complexity of the constantly changing curriculum, Daily
University students enjoy lifelong learning. They are
trained in the inexplicable and the meticulous, and are
committed to
accumulating wisdom. And thanks to an anonymous benefactor,
Daily U. is well endowed.
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